SEO Cold Callers

Has anybody else been getting swamped with goals from people purporting to represent Google?

Every day several companies contact us, all claiming to get us top search engine ranking. The offer usually consists of picking a key word phrase, paying them a small amount of money and then entrusting them with a budget to ensure we feature top for other search phrases related to our business.

Whether or not the system works or not is of very little concern to us. Furthermore we have no desire to learn about it for 2 reasons.
1) The person has attempted to trick us by suggesting that they work for Google
2) It sounds to us as if this is just the latest in a long line of short cut to success marketing techniques.

The receptionists at Basketsgalore are instructed to be polite to cold calls. In our earlier lives as students or travellers, many of us have had to perform similar jobs, so understand that there are many people out there just filling in their time.

However, our message to the SEO optimisers is that we'll take our chances by building the best web-sites that we can dedicated solely to delivering Gift Baskets and Gourmet hampers to the UK, Ireland and Europe. Maybe we're being incredibly naive here, but our view is that if we do a good job, then we will naturally gravitate towards the top positions as we will be relevant. If we don't then we will sink without trace. Either way the internet becomes a better place!

The conversation usually goes like this:
Caller: Hello Can I speak to the person who handles your marketing?
Receptionist: Have you an appointment?
Caller: He's expecting my call! (Cheeky little fib, but we'll let it go)
Receptionist: Who are you calling from?
Caller: Google

At Christmas time when staff are working long hours to fulfil orders one such caller had the audacity to phone back in order that they could hang up the phone. This was in spite of the fact that the Business Development Manager had taken the call and told them that they weren't interested in a polite manner and put the phone down. Clearly the caller wanted to try to convince them otherwise and felt sleighted, but seriously guys you'd get fed up too if you had to listen to the same offer being made time after time every day.

It's not that we don't appreciate people claiming that they can get us top positions in the short term. It's just that we feel that there are no short term solutions, so the receptionists in Basketsgalore have been given the authority to say no. They don't need to refer the matter to a higher authority. They are entrusted just to say no. We can't as a company afford for time to be wasted taking your calls in such a competitive industry.

So this got us thinking that these companies must all use Google's name in order to get through to speak to somebody beyond the receptionist. How many other companies signed up to ineffective marketing campaigns on the mistaken assumption that they were dealing with a company connected with Google.

The truth is that Google Marketing Campaigns are so simple that you don't need to use intermediaries. You just contact Google directly and pay them as you go along.

The real Google don't phone little companies like us and tell us how they can manipulate their own results. They will either order from us online because it is efficient and great value or they email us with their offer. They spend their time creating a system in which companies can transfer goods and services in a timely and efficient manner. Cold calling is not timely nor efficient so we know Google wouldn't waste their time.

So next time the receptionists hear the word Google, SEO or pay per click, they will have permission to politely say "No thanks!" The phone will be put down, please don't feel offended, its just that invoking the Google name is not going to work anymore.